Gabby Douglas, first African-American winner of the Women’s Gymnastics All Around Gold, is confused. Frankly, I’m confused as well.
Gabby Douglas, image from wikimedia by Xxjenesaispasxx
When 16-yr-old Gabby googled herself a few hours after achieving the highest accomplishment in Olympic women’s gymnastics, she found that people weren’t only tweeting about her success, they were tweeting criticisms about her hair!
“Gabby Douglas, you made history w/your impeccable talent and hideous hair.” @BReeMonroe
“We, as a black community, gotta fix Gabby Douglas’s hair.” @Sarocious
“Congrats to Gabby Douglas on her gold metal! Wish I could say the same about that hair! OMG horrible!” @shestaken
Seriously! I never cease to be amazed at people and their priorities.
How can they possibly be criticizing little Gabby Douglas for her hair when there have been far more egregious fashion faux pas from every corner of the Olympic compound?
Take Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce. Who cares that she won a repeat gold in the women’s 100 meter dash when it’s overshadowed by the fact that her tag was sticking up out of her running shorts when she crossed the finish line?
Then there are the Women’s Beach Volleyball bikini bottoms. What difference does all that hustle and jump make when those ladies have more crack than the entire city of Detroit?
Hello? Men’s track stars? You’re really wearing those banana shoes?
And don’t even get me started on those horses in the equestrian events. Some of them made no effort to restrain their free-flowing tails, showing no respect for the fact that they were jumping more obstacles than average Americans do when collecting their own money from their medical flexible spending accounts.
Don’t these athletes realize that no matter what they do, the most important thing when they are on TV is their hair? Where is the Olympic Committee in all of these uniform travesties? Why aren’t they stopping these fashion fails?
Bottom line? This young lady traveled 20 hours from home to live with strangers so that she could train with a great coach. She left her family and friends to follow a dream at only fourteen. She not only went to school but worked what amounted to a full time job in preparing for this event. She could dye her hair purple, wear it in dreadlocks, or even shave her head and it wouldn’t detract one bit from how lovely she is.
I appreciated the sentiment of this “Pulp Fiction” spoof.
WARNING: EXCESSIVE, EXTREMELY OFFENSIVE LANGUAGE, JUST LIKE THE ORIGINAL “PULP FICTION.”
What athletes are impressing you during this Olympic Games?
All the best to all of you for a week of knowing what’s important.
Piper Bayard—The Pale Writer of the Apocalypse